


tacitae praecepta (the rules unspoken)

by Fishandchickennuggetsplease



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Cheryl needs a hug, Coming of Age, Feelings, Gen, Grief, If You Squint - Freeform, family troubles, some cheryl/polly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-09
Updated: 2017-05-09
Packaged: 2018-10-29 23:24:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10864296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fishandchickennuggetsplease/pseuds/Fishandchickennuggetsplease
Summary: "There are rules, and while they went mostly unspoken, that didn't mean they weren't screaming through her mind every time Penelope Blossom looked at her."A bit of a character piece for Cheryl- the pressures she faces, the people she loves, the ways she grows.





	tacitae praecepta (the rules unspoken)

**Author's Note:**

> This piece fits with Canon to episode 12, who knows what will happen in the finale!
> 
> I think Cheryl is one of the most complex and well created characters on Riverdale, I couldn't resist trying to get inside her mind and this is the result.

 

 _There are rules!_ Jason whispers dramatically, flopping back onto the silky Crimson comforter that lay flat on her vast double bed. "Ways to do it, to make it perfect like Daddy does," he pauses, clearly mulling over his next words, "and all Daddy's friends said I was super good at it, Cher. Isn't it cool?"

Cheryl Blossom, aged five and eleven months, thinks her twin brother hangs the stars in the dark night outside of their house. She nods enthusiastically from her position on the top of the bed before lying down on her brothers chest with a sigh. "Awesome, JJ. I just wish Daddy had tooken me with him." She responds wistfully, thinking of her more monotonous day spent colouring in her room then getting screamed at by her Mommy for getting marker on her sleeve.

Jason only rolls out from under her and reminds her that that isn't how the maple syrup industry works, that's it's passed from father to son and always will be- but trails off as he realises those are his fathers words and abandons the speech, a mischievous glint catching his eye. He grabs a rolled up ball of socks and hands it to his sister, only ten minutes younger than him, and puts on his best accent, mimicking their Father. "Head back, shoulders steady..." He swings the makeshift bat behind his torso, "Aaaaaand HIT!"

The last word was louder and hung in the air causing the twins to tense, but when no footsteps came they bust into hearty laughter and spend the rest of the evening tapping the imaginary maple tree that was Cheryl's bed post, rules forgotten. The darkness that festered in the corners of the Blossom house would try to tear at their relationship, and she would cling to that night of kindness and unity like it was gold.

\- - - -

"Smile, Cheryl, Dear." The thinly veiled threat slipped through her Mommy's smiling teeth as they posed for what felt like the millionth time that night. Cheryl straightened her posture to muster the best, most regal smile that would grace her seven year old features (the one that hid her fear) until the photographers moved away and their parents let them loose into the banquet room for a few short minutes before bed. Of course, letting the Blossom twins loose essentially meant using them to cosy up to whatever investor Clifford Blossom needed to persuade, and her mothers eyes shot those warnings as Cheryl headed toward their guests. _There are rules_ , and while they went mostly unspoken, that didn't mean they weren't screaming through her mind every time Penelope Blossom looked at her.

Already the smaller and younger twin, she had to try harder to be given the same level of affection her brother recieved with what looked like no effort in his part. He was the heir, the boy, the one who was better at playing their parents' fancy games. Cheryl didn't understand why they had to act this certain way, but JJ seemed to have some hidden understanding of what was expected of them as he wowed guests at every dinner party.

Distracted, she catches her jewel pump on the edge of the stair and crashes to the steps below her, knocking a stand of cocktails from the landing. The glasses shatter around her, red liquid soaking through her velvet party dress. Jason tries to grab her sleeve and pull her into the coat room and get her out of the spotlight, but her Daddy sweeps in, pulls his wailing daughter into his arms and marches her from the ballroom while his wife assured the guests that their youngest would be fine.

She's thrown into her room (her and Jason moved into separate bedrooms the pervious year and she had more frequent nightmares since) and told not to come out till called. She crawls out of the dress and cries to sleep, watches the sun rise then set again before Penelope Blossom can even stand to come near her daughter. "How are you so useless? You don't see your brother making a scene like that, you clumsy little acci..." She trails off, clamping her mouth around the next insult and swallowing it back down. "Selfish, that what you are, always needing attention. Well I hope you enjoyed it." It's in that moment Cheryl realises _there are rules_ she'll always break just by existing.

Tears pool in the edge of her eyes, a cry waiting in her throat- she swallows it down and slides on her glossy mask which will keep her safe, _there are rules there are rules there are rules_.

\- - - -

The rules are different at school. There's the elementary's rules about punching and playing on the grass, of course, but the playground is governed by its own set of rules. Written in lime green biro in a school workbook and decorated with as many stickers as the page could fit, the numbered list kept the whole grade in orbit around her. _There are rules_ , she hisses at the younger and poorer girls who ask timidly to play on the swings, "if you follow them, you're welcome here. If not, well then it's a shame you ever asked at all."

Most queens rule their courts from grand palaces, but Cheryl's kingdom operated from the swing set and she was just as powerful a monarch. What is important is this: she is not a benevolent ruler. She is no stranger to punishments. (Polly Cooper shared her candy at break time and was just as popular, but the ways she ruled her kingdom were too foreign for Cheryl to even consider mimicking). Every lunch, they played games where she was the star. All the girls liked them more when Jason would abandon his football and play too, and they shared a party for the first time that year. Polly shot her glances throughout the entire day, as if she knew something that Cheryl didn't, could tell the real reason their whole grade class had shown up to the birthday bash. She would remain oblivious to it for years to come.

\- - - - 

At twelve, the rules shift. _There are new rules_ , more complex and intricate and her mothers eye watches her like police on a stakeout. Jason has always been the beloved boy, the one who could follow the guidebook and excel, the one being nurtured to take on the business, but he can't help her anymore because this new role is about being a Lady. She is mildly gawky and can spot the beginning of blemishes that would mar her skin and oh, she still feels like a child. She is a child- her dresses become more adult-like, she is handed a make up kit and told to learn to use it. She's not a child, her days of being cute are over, her Mommy's disappointed eyes tell her. Her job isn't to woo potential partners for her father, but to start thinking about the younger boys in the room, each the heir to a syrup covered fortune, and see them as her future partners.

At every party, she knows her mother's gaze is locked on her. Biting her nails is a punishable offence, laughing too loudly could cause a scene, taking a second helping at dessert when Jason does earns her a sharp lecture.

"I'm not buying you anything bigger than a size 4, so get it together" came the warning. She doesn't eat for three days and adds these new rules to the pile that she is swamped in.

\- - - -

She makes the River Vixens as a freshman and looks forward to practice more than anything in the world. In dancing, _there are rules_ and she's pretty flawless at executing the sequences - She's been bending over backwards to fill greater demands for years. The Vixens are nearly a family, or what she thinks a family would be, and is crowned the HBIC by junior year. She turns Betty Cooper down for the squad because she's a timid freshman and her sister has given her piercing looks that know too much since they had been in grade school.

(Polly Cooper gives Jason softer looks and kind words - she knows they're on the brink of falling in love and refusing Betty a spot on the squad seems like the only victory over the girl with everything she's ever wanted.)

Polly quits mid season after a screaming row between the two of them where she's called names almost as cruel as the worst things she has overheard Mommy and Daddy call her. Whispers of cow, devil, follow her down corridors for a week. She gets a reputation for being cold when she doesn't respond to a single taunt even though she can think of a wicked retort- she swallows it down and slides on her glossy mask which will keep her safe, _there are rules there are rules there are rules_.

It's better, for people to see her as cruel- the way to stop being scared, she realises, is to be scary.

\- - - -

Josie McCoy had sat beside her in their first maths class on the first day on sophomore year and their whispered conversations in the back of the class had become study dates had become an invitation to Pussycat practice had become a real friendship with the Mayors daughter. When Josie talked about the weight of expectations and the stress of holding herself up under them, she feels a sharp pang of familiarity in the McCoy's family situation. Besides, they had the same interests and views on partially everything, expect the class that had launched their friendship - Cheryl loved the subject (" _There are rules_ , and they make sense Josie!") while Josie spent a lot of time napping in her back row desk.

\- - - - 

Jason sits her down in a booth at Pops and tells her the plan, the pregnancy and the new life. "I'm sick of this place Cher. _There are rules_ that keep us stuck here in fear and I need to break them. The business, the way Dad is running things...For Polly's sake. The Baby's. Please help?" She realises he's not her perfect twin and She's never hated him more.

\- - - - 

They take a boat and she hugs him goodbye and he promises he'll tell her when they're safe. She washes up on a rock and fakes the death and plays _by the rules_ until she goes home and crys to sleep under the covers, the weight of the comforter that's too heavy for the summer heat and a million feelings pressing into her. She ends up curled in Jason's bed reading his favourite novels in the dead of night. It's the fifth of July.

\- - - - 

At cheerleading tryouts she challenges Betty about Polly and wants her to scream a defence for her sister, the one who stole her brother away. She doesn't, she won't - she never will.

Veronica Lodge steps forward and blasts ice into her core and she longs to break rules like that. _There are rules_ , she tells the two Vixen-wannabes, but they're in the squad before she can overrule her subjects. It's a reminder that the people she rules resent her- they came to her parties only because she shared them with Jason. (Later, Veronica would dance her way into the hearts of the squad and leave her stranded on the gym floor. Later Cheryl would crash a birthday party and get the whole school drunk. Later, Veronica would accuse her of twincest as she shot insults back about the Lodge's business. Later, Veronica would perform while she is left stranded on the dance floor. Later, _the rules_ would change.)

\- - - - 

She walks downstairs in white and cries on the coffin, "I'm so sorry JJ" spilling from her lips. Her mother tells her no one would take her, that she's selfish and leaves her to cry- not for herself, but for her brother (shot in the head, tortured oh why didn't I protect him) and his life that _followed all the rules_ but smashed to pieces anyway. Veronica Lodge is the one who sleeps the night and comforts her and it's so bizarre but nothing in her life has ever felt quite natural so she leans into the darker girl and thinks about enemies and killers and lovers and doesn't really see too much difference. Each comes with rules. Each leaves their mark.

\- - - - 

She taps the maple tree and thinks about learning these motions with socks in her bedroom, thinks about the rules that go into it. She smiles at Polly and _there are rules_ , the benefactors are watching but they don't think she can inherit the business and they never think she can do anything but she can do this so _eff your rules_ she kisses Archie Andrews and _there are rules_ , she likes Val and she doesn't deserve to be cheated on but who cares anymore it was Jason who f _ollowed rules_ and someone put a bullet through his skull and there's times she wishes that would happen to her, it would end this torture she endures every time she steps through Thornhill's gates, Polly Cooper sleeps in the room adjacent to hers and carries her Brother's twins, she's nearly an ally nearly a friend now and _there are rules_. Archie rejects her and she nearly screams at him _screw your rules_ but swallows it down and slides on her glossy mask which will keep her safe, _there are rules there are rules there are rules._

The rules are hiding what's under the surface.

\- - - - 

Thornhill has never been a warm or cosy home. In grade school the picture books full of picket fences had felt foreign to her- the only home she had ever known is ornate, empty, filled with echos and secrets. Polly doesn't trust the dark cold halls; Polly doesn't trust their dark cold world at all. Sometimes she sees her curling up tight underneath the covers and thinks she's probably dreaming of Betty, of Jason, of another reality.

Polly didn't trust them and she realises she doesn't either- The milkshake knocks her friend out cold. The freezing metal of the ring digs into her palm and her parents congratulate her on being the true Blossom, on _playing by the rules_.

\- - - - 

Thuds resound through the house and she slips on a silk robe, tugging Polly from her bed and clinging to her hand as they rushed down to the grand staircase at the front of the house. Betty Cooper, her parents walk in. Cooper? Blossom? The twins are... That breaks a good few rules.

Polly begins to cry and Cheryl makes one final attempt to hold on to the girl that's become so much more than the ruler of the opposing elementary school playground regime. She leaves with her real family, Betty spitting out an accusation as she turned on her heel and left the mansion.

(Cheryl thinks about slapping Jughead, attacting him, finally _breaking rules_ , waiting to feel good about the solved case and that feeling never coming.)

\- - - - 

"What was Jay Jay running away from?"

\- - - - 

She wipes away her tears and walks to the table. She looks her Father dead in the eye (in between the eyes, she thinks about a gun shot and Betty Copper's phone call). _Screw the rules._ "You did a bad thing Daddy. And now everyone knows."

\- - - - 

The lights flash blue and red as they snake up the long driveway, their colour spilling into the pitch black night. There are no stars: there is no Jason to hang them there. She points Keller in the right direction. _That's right Daddy. You never have to pay for this now, you never have to tell us why you killed him. Jason I'm sorry I couldn't keep the rules I'm sorry I couldn't break them I'm so sorry I just want you back again did you know Polly has Blossom blood? No if course not you knew those rules are there even any rules left when there's only two of us, God there's only two you made sure all the kids came to my party you ran away for Polly- you weren't perfect ~~but you were breathing~~_

\- - - - 

Keller finds the body. She doesn't cry. She doesn't scream- she swallows it down and slides on her glossy mask which will keep her safe, _there are rules there are rules there are rules._

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading :)


End file.
